These days I really find great symbolism in shapes. While a circle may not be the most architecturally strong (it comes close, but the triangle is the strongest), in the spiritual world it holds to be the strongest for me. I could write about the symbol of my wedding band, the circle of life, the wheel of the year; while these are extremely important symbols in my life, it is the image of a circle of people that has inspired me to write on this topic. Two very meaningful situations has come up in the past week for me, and those are the stories I would like to tell you about today.
When I place these situations in a visual form, I see two concentric circles. Depending on the emotions involved, the circles may be spinning clockwise, counterclockwise or one of each. The inner circle is the one that is closest to me in proximity of these two stories, and that is my spiritual circle. Not too long ago, depression took over my life. So many things going wrong (from my depressed perspective), post-partum depression, and it all was getting worse and worse over the past 3 years. Finally I couldn't take the stress of the emotions any more and I had to remove myself from positions of leadership, this included my leadership role of my healing circle. It was not fair to me to allow the stress of leading and organizing bring me down any further, and it was not fair to the members to have me leading in a very poor state of mind. It was best for us all for me to step back until I was in a better place. This, of course, did not mean I was stepping away for good, nor that I was rejecting any friendships I had made. I was not, and thankfully my close friends stayed close. Fast forward six months and I am doing much, much better, and this couldn't have come soon enough. A close friend whom I distanced myself from due to not being able to handle the conflict we found ourselves in has been diagnosed with cancer. This friend is also the the full owner of that healing circle I once co-owned with her. The circle has been quiet, with friends keeping up with each other but no activity. This ended as soon as news reached me that she was in need of prayer, support and energy. I sent out a message to all of the members who were active at the time I stepped down from the group to let them know I would be hosting a healing circle. I was sure I would get response of prayers, but the response I received from people saying they would attend and help organize some healing projects was tremendous. This is a true spiritual circle. It may become dormant, but no matter the conflict or friendship status, surrounding a friend in need with full force, no matter what, that is the definition of a healing circle.
I described the concentric circles before. That was the circle that was closest to the center, and a few weeks ago I would have told you it was moving counterclockwise. That motion came to a screeching halt and is now full force clockwise being as productive as ever. Our first meeting for shared energies (in the same room) will be scheduled for next Saturday night at 8:30p CST for anyone who wants to join. If you are interested in joining in on distance shared energies, another member quickly scheduled a 9pm CST daily prayer timeframe for her. Please join us in lighting a candle, meditating or praying for our dear friend, that the cancer is healed and her spirit stays high during this difficult time.
Now for that outer circle, the group of people who aren't quite so close to me in proximity, many whom I've never met, but they are touching my life just the same. This circle, from my perspective, moves between counterclockwise and clockwise a bit more sporadically. It is mainly determined by the media articles and Facebook threads I read. This is the circle of support from other Pagans when religious tolerance toward Paganism is not being practiced. The story starts on Facebook with my curiosity getting the best of me. A suggest page came up to me, and I clicked on it. From that day on my life has been touched. I want to send a thank you to Confessions of a Pagan Soccer Mom. Mr's B, it was your Facebook page that inspired this portion of my post here. Mr's B, has great information on her blog, and I was really getting inspired to explore more into nature and my own personal beliefs. One day recently she announced that her blog was selected for the Top 25 Faith blogs on Circle of Mom's, and here is where the magic really starts. In this contest different blogs from any faith are nominated as one of the top 25 faith blogs by moms. Anyone can go in and vote for the blog, or blogs, they find to be the most deserving of this online status. Mrs. B was nominated as well as several blogs by people of many faiths. I didn't go on to vote until I read that there were many people from other faiths being negative about the presence of Pagan blogs in the contest, stating they did not feel they were following a legitimate faith and did not want to be rated side by side. This really started when Mrs B's blog was gaining ground in the contest. The reason I started voting wasn't as a camaraderie of support for the Pagan blogs, however many in the Pagan community did go show their support this way. I started voting after I read a snark comment by one of the other faith blogs, which soon after was met with a flood of comments by both Pagan and other faiths. At this time the blog author posted an apology acknowledging the true meaning of their faith and wished Mrs B luck. At the point where I seen that change in demeanor, that is where I knew this contest was making a difference. This is the point where I found the counterclockwise circle changing directions and even my disappointment was met with hope. I started voting, not just for Pagan blogs, but for blogs of any faith that holds a strong message of faith, true faith and love. Soon after, Mr's B posted another link to a wonderful blog post by Julie, addressing her change of heart for Paganism. While she admits she does not have to agree with Paganism, her faith tells her to love thy neighbor, no matter what, and this is what she has done. Her blog post was flooded with loving comments from people of different faiths, but specifically many Pagans. I took the time to send a personal email thanking her for wonderful words, and received an even greater message back. From here I believe I have made a new friend. Because of her words I hope that she is touching the hearts and minds of many who are uneducated about the true meaning of Paganism. This is an amazing circle, growing everyday, hopefully to include peace and everyone in the world. Thanks to Mr's B, Circle of Moms and Julie, I feel my outer circle is spinning just as fast and smooth as my inner circle.
I am feeling pretty good right now. I still have fears and worry in my mind, but I have love, support and strength in my heart. Thanks to my friends, family and strangers (who won't be strangers for long) who touch my life.
Brightest Blessings,
Ava
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